Why becoming your own BFF will change your life for the better
Who’s always got your back? Has no expectations? Agrees with your movie choice? Will always nap with you? Doesn’t break your heart? Who will be by your side up until the last boot camp hurdle? Yup, it’s you.
It’s the best, longest, hardest, but ultimately most rewarding relationship you will ever have.
We chatted to couples therapist Isiah McKimmie on how to embrace being your own BFF, and why it will change your life.
SHE’S ALWAYS BEEN THERE FOR YOU, AND ALWAYS WILL BE
Is that not the best thing you have ever heard? No one is ever going to have your back 110% like you do (self-five!). Isiah reminds us that if you can’t find her, you just need to listen a little harder. “I realised I could choose which thoughts I paid attention to, the ones I gave energy to. And now the voice I hear most clearly, and the one I take the most notice of, is that of my inner best friend. She was right there, waiting for me to pay attention all along.” Sigh, what a beautiful realisation.
YOUR INNER BFF HAS ALL THE WISE WORDS
“When times get tough, our instinct tells us to reach out to those around us for help. And while this is a great source of comfort, learning to not only listen to, but trust your own inner wisdom is so valuable,” says Isiah. Let’s be honest, who knows you better than yourself and can dish up some worthy wisdom bombs?
YOU’LL HAVE STRONGER RELATIONSHIPS WITH OTHERS
“Relationships need a certain amount of independence to thrive and the more we love ourselves, the more love we can give to another,” says Isiah. Make the move and you’ll get yourself as a BFF, as well as building a tribe of supportive ladies behind you. #doublewin!
Isiah adds that we need to practice our inner strength to become stronger. “Become your own best friend because you never know when you’ll need to rely on yourself and it’s a relationship that will last for the rest of your life.”
YOU’LL LEARN TO TREAT YO’SELF
We all agree that spoiling someone you love is the best, so being your own best friend means, of course, you get to spoil yourself! Isiah suggests “take yourself on a date each week, go to a fancy restaurant, see a movie, go for a walk or light the candles and have a delicious dinner at home – all just for you and all by yourself.” It doesn’t have to be all posh dinners or Lush bath bombs. It could also be treating yourself with kindness and patience. “Mindfulness and meditation are wonderful ways to support yourself. This could be taking time out in the morning to be in silence and stillness, or simply being present in the moment during the day,” says Isiah.
Being your own best friend is life changing. It allows you to buy yourself the best presents, give yourself 110% support and develop healthy relationships with others.